Now sitting in a meeting – thinking about you as always. I really struggle to know what to write but the closeness this morning just holding you tight is so mesmerising and I am lost as to how best to describe / explain how I feel. I can only say that I have never experienced such closeness before.

I know that you said that you did not want to be seen as gentle and tender but you are exactly that – and then so much more and then even more again on top of that. I have never experienced what you make me feel – which is why I said that it was unexpected – but it is absolutely amazing. Please don’t ever say sorry for something so beautiful and enchanting.

I love you.

Been rushing about – wanted to write – I am completely overwhelmed by you. The time together this morning was just extraordinary. You are an absolute delight to me and I am so very lucky indeed. To see your smile and hold you, to feel you soft skin and to kiss you – the most enchanting experience ever.

You are a very special person indeed.

I love you beautiful one.

Good morning lovely one – see you soon – longing to hold you and to smell that wonderful fragrance that surrounds you – enchanting as always.

I love you.

Can’t sleep (as usual) – dreaming of you. Wanting to be close, to feel you next to me, safe in my arms, beautiful one.

I love you.

Hello beautiful one, I will feel so much better in the morning in anticipation of seeing you. For now, I sit here with my eyes closed hearing your voice, seeing your smile and remembering the tranquillity of tracing patterns on your skin – and I am content.

I love you.

I think about you and how lovely you are – and then I think about me and the odd things I do. I know that I am not the best at communication, I not infrequently feel that I am fundamentally lazy, and part of me thinks that the other part of me is probably a bit Asperger like. But in my defence, I do love you with all my heart. What I don’t get at all is why you want me – I am so very pleased that you do and I do believe you (I trust you absolutely with everything that is me) – but I still don’t get it. But sometimes life is just like that I guess.

I am transformed by you though – the disruption that you create in my head is profound and at the same time so very calming. I am sat here trying to find the words to describe how wonderful you are, and how much your tenderness touches me but I just can’t seem to. I am close to tears because I wish I knew how to explain this all to you, and how to show you what you mean to me, but I am, I think, just a bit inept. But one day I will figure it out – and in the meantime I will write to you, and care for you, and love you in every way I can in the hope that you will, with time, come to understand how special you are to me.

I love you.

Another walk – whispering your name to myself, hearing you in my head telling me that you love me. Looking forward to tomorrow morning so much.

Thinking about how beautiful you are and how I love to caress your gentle curves and your soft skin – it makes me realise what true beauty is – and it is most definitely present in you.

I love you.

Thinking about you – wanting to hold you. Whatever I try to do, almost immediately you are there in my mind. In a really nice way you intrude on my thoughts, interrupting me, constantly reminding me how lovely you are. And what is so striking about it all is how happy it makes me feel even though part of me aches because we are not together. But the happiness part at least makes our time apart bearable although it all pales into insignificance compared with the joy of actually seeing you.

Every morning I sit in my office hoping to hear your steps on the stairs – and then when you arrive I am so very pleased to see you. Sometimes I worry that I overwhelm you a bit when you first arrive by being somewhat intense but I do on occasions struggle because of how you make me feel. So apologies if this is the case – I simply adore you.

I love you beautiful one.