Kindness, tenderness, love and affection – you are amazing. My heart is yours and I love you more than I know how to describe x.

I have been thinking about showing you more of what I feel – not hiding away so much. Sometimes I feel a bit anxious about it because I have spent so long hiding me away and it feels very safe and comfortable now after so many years. But the problem is that I don’t want to be like that with you. I can’t really explain what it is about you but I feel so very safe with you – I know for sure that you will always be gentle with me. You talked the other day of not wanting me to feel that you are making me do something that I don’t want to do – but you have never done that, ever. And I know for sure that you would never do that to me – I trust you absolutely – that’s why I have always known that we will have no boundaries.

So even though I feel a bit anxious at times I really want to be truly me with you. I know what I feel about you – I love you absolutely – and I think that most of the time I show you that but sometimes it gets hidden away and that is not good for either of us. So I need to ask you, if you feel that I am not showing you what you need to see, please tell me – “us” is a wonderful thing and I believe that me being more open with you will simply make it even better. I really need help with this but equally I really want to do this for “us”. You are unique, you are everything, you are the love of my life – I have to be me with you. Sometimes I might get a bit anxious about this – so please bear with me – but please push me if I need a push.

I love you my darling – you are my beautiful one – this is truly very important to me because the prize for me in this is the ultimate prize – you – and I have to and want to do everything that I possibly can to make sure that I don’t lose you ever. x

Sitting outside for a minute at Dad’s – thinking about you – peace and quiet now allowing me to properly hear your voice – the “thank you” that I love. Have been reading your messages from yesterday – I will never forget you my darling – I will always keep you safe I promise.

Thinking about next weekend and being together- dreaming of your gentle curves – the very essence of beautiful femininity that you are – lying with me and falling asleep in my arms. The perfect evening with the perfect woman and my heart soars.

May will be a good month for time together and I will look for more chances for the future too. I want time with you so that I can show you that you are the love of my life x.

Hello beautiful one – finally sitting down for a bit so writing you a message – will be going to Dad’s soon to sort some food for him.

I miss you so very much – my heart yearns and yearns for you. You are constantly in my thoughts – really lovely thoughts of funny things, joyous things, loving things, sexy things, beautiful things – so many things – and all truly wonderful. And then of course some truly heavenly things when I notice that my triceps are sore and remember about lifting you up and down. And what a wonderful feeling that is.

I am really looking forward to next weekend and our time together. I really need time with you for “us” – so much to explore with you my darling.

Whatever transpires here each day – and it is a bit like a lucky dip, who knows what the next day’s question will be – I will be fine. I am so used to so much of this in one form or another that it just washes over me. I can’t pretend that some of it isn’t hurtful at times but truly that is pretty rare – usually I just get a bit fed up. But over the years I have learnt to do what you said, smile, carry stuff, pay etc.

You are exquisite my darling, definitely perfect – I long to be with you. I am mesmerised and enchanted by you – I never imagined that you would be quite the amazing and unique soul that you are. My days are always enriched by the love that you show me, and all of this together means that every day I feel a little overwhelmed in a really nice way by having you in my life. You have transformed my life – you are extraordinary. Time away from you reinforces how much you mean to me – I will not give you up.

You are my beautiful one and I love you x.

Good morning – I hope that you slept well. Thinking about you just fills my heart with happiness and brings such brightness to my life – your radiant smile simply melts me and I adore you. I love you so very much indeed my beautiful one x.

Dreaming of you – lovely dreams tonight – just missing you so very much – I love you x

The third of the toilet messages – I drank a lot of Diet Coke! I miss you loads and love you even more my beautiful one. I hope that you are ok my darling – I love you so very much indeed x.

Toilet visit 2 – I adore you beautiful one – dinner with you would be fantastic and that is all I long for – just waiting patiently for our time next week – I miss you terribly – all I want is to love you x