Hello – the last few days have been difficult – I cannot explain the pain of last night. I know that you were drunk and that is fine – really – but I have to explain – you did not do anything wrong, you did not upset me, being drunk did not upset me, you did not have anything to apologise for. Nothing to apologise for – and please don’t – because that in itself upsets me – you are definitely perfect. What caused me to struggle was you being unwell, me being far away and being completely unable to help – profound helplessness and I cried lots.

I want us to move closer together – I will work towards that – this is the only path that I want. You make me so very happy – and without you I am bereft, broken, lonely, upset, stressed and more. But when I am with you – everything in the world is just fine – you are the love of my life – you are everything x.

Thank you for letting me love you – thank you for letting me call – thank you for being the most perfect woman I have ever known.

I promise that I want you – you won’t lose me along the way on our journey – I love you my beautiful one – tomorrow is our time x.