Trying to sleep – no good. So tried listening to a podcast on Georg Cantor’s infinity theory and whilst it is interesting (honest it is!) it does not help. In my heart of hearts there is nothing that will help me apart from you with your beautiful soft skin, lying here next to me, naked in my arms.

I love you – sweet dreams.

I have been thinking a lot about today, this evening.

We were incredibly close today – it was very very very lovely, a reflection of how truly beautiful you are to me. I worry though that I may have been way too forward in what I did at one point – I am very sorry if this is so. Although what happened is something that I have dreamt about and indeed have hoped for, I am really very sorry if this was just the wrong time and / or place – or simply more than you were comfortable with at this point.

For me though you just genuinely overwhelm me in every way and I don’t think that I am completely in control of myself at times – this is not meant to be an excuse, but more of an observation. Never before though have I felt what I felt today – your hands are the most magical and you are so very gentle and tender with me. At the same time I have never previously found myself quite so driven to be intimate with someone – I felt such a strong compulsion to physically love you. For me this just reinforces your absolute beauty and your idyllic presence in my heart. And I remain overwhelmed as I sit here now – on the verge of tears because I cannot really find the words to describe the wave of profound closeness and love that swept across me this afternoon whilst we were together.

You are indeed an very special person – “us” has already become a very special ‘thing’ in my heart – a true delight. I know that it is my job to take care of you and to look after your heart and I promise absolutely to do so – but I also (for my own sake before I burst with love for you) feel a compulsion to tell you how I feel about you – hence all of this.

One last thing perhaps – I need you to understand what you mean to me. Notwithstanding all of the above and the beauty that I see in you every day, I need you, and not just for physical reasons. Please do not misunderstand me, to say that I am attracted to you physically barely touches the surface of what I dream about for our time together; but at the same time, I could and would happily spend the rest of our lives together talking and simply being together as “us” without any physical intimacy – there would though still be the utmost love. I need you exactly as you are, in my head, disrupting and breaking every single rule that I had previously put in place – but in doing so liberating my soul to deliver someone who is unequivocally in love with you, and who is deliriously happy and content for the first time in a very long time. I do not want you to be anything other than you are – and one day I will explain properly about Zeno’s paradox!

I love you my beautiful one, x.

I am at a loss to describe what a beautiful person you – our time this afternoon was just perfect.

I love you so very much.

The gentleness in your voice is so beguiling and intoxicating – I just want to hold you in my arms, you are so lovely.

I love you.

Hello beautiful one – missing you and looking forward to seeing you later. That very thought makes the day much brighter and lifts me up. I think that you are a truly amazing person and I am absolutely captivated by you – and that is just how I want things to be.

I love you.

Travelling – missing you already. Lots of thoughts in my head about you – all lovely ones. You are very beautiful – it took all my will power to resist caressing the very sexy bottom walking up the stairs in front of me this morning!

I know that there are some challenges for us re time together etc but I hope you know how happy you make me – I hope too that I do the same for you.

I love you.

Only a fleeting visit this morning but always enough to reinforce with me how adorable you are – so very beautiful. Holding you and caressing your neck – for me this is absolute contentment.

I hope that you have a good day – looking forward to seeing you later. x

I love you.

So looking forward to seeing you. Hope you slept better last night.

Just want to hold you, to look into your eyes and tell you how much you mean to me. I want you to understand how much I care about you, how precious you are to me, and how much I need to see you and be with you. Perhaps somewhere in the midst of that will be something that, if only in part, goes to soothe the anguish you feel when we are apart. I so wish I could take that all from you.

You are always in my thoughts beautiful one.

I love you.