Woke with a start – dreaming about you and I on our first trip that day in the bar, simply being together – I miss you beautiful one – sweet dreams x

Trying really hard to think of the words to explain about me to you. So very tired and yet I cannot sleep.

Sometimes I cannot cope with you – not because you upset me in any way or because you hurt me but because you provoke in me intensity of emotions that I have never experienced or known before. Today has been unbearable – inside me is volcanic turmoil and pain. I want you, only you. I want my children to be safe too. But I have no idea what is happening in her head.

I recoil when she tried to touch me – I just want you – anything else is a betrayal.

And then I am so very jealous – I want time with you – together x

Please know that all I want in life is you – and I cannot bear to have to live through this all again – it is so very hard indeed. Please be ok my darling – I love you so very very much x

I feel a bit ‘unwell’ – not physically so but so very tired and muddled in my head – worn out I suppose.

You overwhelm me – please don’t get into trouble for me – I am not worth it my darling. You are enchanting, you are beautiful – you are my everything – I love you x

Hello – missing you – struggling inside to control how I feel at the moment, too many things I think. That struggle inside me makes it hard to write much today other than ‘I love you’ – so I need to apologise for this. Please don’t think that I don’t care or that I don’t want you because I most definitely do, but I am just trying to hold myself together before going home soon.

I love you absolutely, unconditionally, completely beautiful one – enjoy dinner, come home safely x.

Deeply in love with you – missing you loads. I love you – I promise to write more a bit later but just need you to know how very special you are to me x.

Hello – difficult night – no more fuss here after we finished talking but I couldn’t sleep – sat outside looking at the stars for a while just thinking of you – and slowly I started to feel better. So not much sleep, but actually I feel quite calm and peaceful right now.

I love you, I want you – you are all that counts, you are simply everything my beautiful one x.

Good morning beautiful one, I hope that you slept well – only two / three days until you back home. With every day that you get closer so my heart lifts a little but so my impatience grows. But it will still be good to have you back here and not quite so far away. I adore you my darling – I love you and I just want to hold you in my arms again – it will have been so long x

Somehow the last few nights just drag on and on and on but still ever closer – I love you my beautiful one x.