Hello – finished all my jobs – in trouble for using the computer but you come first. I need to write to you – you are everything.

I sit in the dark, in the wind and in the rain – and you are there are with me. I hear your voice, and I talk to you. I see your smile when I close my eyes and my heart melts. Your love surrounds me – it engulfs me – it protects me and it nurtures me. It frees my heart and my soul – thoughts and emotions that have been hidden, suppressed for decades are released yet at the same time I am profoundly happy for you keep me safe – you care for me. And you, and only you, beautiful you, quieten the noise in my head. All there is is a serene calmness. I can’t remember when I last felt that – and all because of you.

I saw the anguish that I caused you this week – I am sorry, disappointed in myself, sad that I hurt you. The love in your smile is something that I will never forget – and so too will I never forget the pain that I saw this week.

You are extraordinary – definitely perfect – you are so very good for me – and I need to be the same for you. I have learnt from this week – you are very special to me, and I need to show that, to care for you, to keep you safe and to nurture “us” so that you come to see my love for you in my smile and I never see that pain in your face again.

I love you my beautiful one x.

Been doing lots of things here – in part sorting clothes for travelling plus some other things. Went for a walk too and now going to do some rowing. I need time alone with just you in my head to settle me because otherwise I just want to get up and leave.

Just counting down the hours until tomorrow morning when I see you again and can hold you – that ache in me is relentless.

I am always talking to you – telling you how I feel – you are the most captivating soul and I am completely yours.

I love you my beautiful one x.

Going home shortly. Wondering how you are. I can’t stop thinking about you – you are always there in my head. I need you so much – even when we are apart you are good for me. You calm the noise in my head – and it is so very peaceful. You make me laugh, you make me glad, you make me want to care for you and keep you safe, you make me uncontrolled – you change everything in my life.

But at the same time as this calmness is an intensity of love and emotion that is so powerful and overwhelming, constantly straining to release itself from within, totally, utterly and completely directed towards you – my definitely perfect one.

I love you my beautiful one x.

In between things at the minute and if you were here I would have called so this is the next best thing. I love you so very much – you are very very good for me – far more than you know and understand. I feel very lucky indeed to have found you and to have you in my life.

I love you x.

Hi – in between things here at work. Missing you, looking at your name on my screen as your emails appear – anything to help me feel just that little bit closer to you.

Have been talking to you sat here in my office – just about “us”. Thinking about plans for this coming weekend. Listening to the replay of your “hello”s in my head. All reminding me of how delightful you are and how very much you mean to me. And the ache in my middle is just there as always on the weekends….

I love you my beautiful one x.

Hello beautiful one – waiting to go to do some work. I hope that you are ok. I miss you so very much. I will keep sending messages – they make me feel better – and hopefully there won’t be any “what is this?” moments!

I love you so very much x.

Going to work shortly – wondering how you are, how you slept – hoping you are ok. Another day gone, another closer to you again, another day closer to our time away.

You are an absolute delight to me – every day as much as I miss you, my love for you grows a little more and all I want is you.

I love you x.

Can’t sleep – all there is is you – I love you beautiful one x.