Where are you tonight? The last new two nights were so very heavenly – waking and finding you with me…… I could not wish for anything more my darling – I love you x.

Hello – I think I am a bit drunk, actually in truth I am very drunk – I just drank it very quickly. Where are you? I need you. Whose idea was it not to run away? This now seems like the perfect idea.

I am listening to your songs and they are very lovely.

Can I confess a sin please? I should have gone with the headline of “she complained lots, and then a bit more, and then a bit more” – so I told her to ‘f off’ and she slapped me round the face twice. So now, I am showered, nice and clean, curly hair lying here dreaming of my beautiful one.

Please say how you are – I worry x.

Good morning my darling – can’t wait until I see you. I have these last few days very hard and so please bear with me if I am bit needy but I miss you so very much. I really want to hold you close and tell you how much I love you – you are everything beautiful one x.

Hello beautiful one – missing you here in the night – so looking forward to tomorrow night falling asleep with you – I love you x.

My heart aches for you – it is bursting with love – so much so that my chest wants to explode. Today has possibly been the worst day since you went away and I watched your plane taking you further and further from me.

You make me complete – happy – settled – content – excited. You are enticing, beautiful, desirable, sexy and so much more – I am so very lucky indeed to have you enriching my life, loving me, wanting me. I adore you – you are definitely perfect.

Why you want me is one of the great mysteries of life; why you find me attractive even more so; and the effect you have on me re glorious is simply heavenly – how you fixed me, why you fixed me – I don’t know but I am so very pleased that this is so. I want you; I want to grow old with you, holding your hand sitting somewhere side by side in the sunshine sharing with each other forever…. x

I love you my beautiful one – you are the love of my life and I long to be with you – always and eternally so x.

Yet more difficult conversations and yet more circular ones too – nothing horrid though, just a bit wearing though. So I sit here and nod and shake my head at the relevant point in the conversation and then explain that it can’t all be my fault, and that my views have not changed nor will I commit beyond July. I am increasingly blunt, trying to be kind but rapidly getting to the edge of things now.

Now walking for a few minutes to get some respite from it all – and I need time with you in my head without interruption. Will go back in a bit and have an early shower – and I have reiterated that a repeat of last night is simply unacceptable – so I think that that will be ok.

How are you my darling? are you ok? I do hope so. I love you so very much – my heart yearns for you every moment of every day that we are apart. I am fine – just a bit worn out but feeling stronger inside because you are in my life. I cannot explain how mesmerising you are, how beautiful you are and how much I want you. You are everything – I love you my beautiful one x.

Hi finished exercise now – arms sore, back stronger though – feeling better for some time alone with your songs.

Wondering how you are – if you are ok. Thinking of that radiant smile illuminating my life – waves of love for you emanating from within me just desperate to hold you close – tomorrow morning…

I dream of your gentle curves, your exquisite femininity and I am overwhelmed by you – I love you my beautiful one x.

These extra days are really very difficult for me and then with all the turmoil yesterday it has been even harder than usual. I have felt very unsettled today really missing you and at times tearful and full of nausea. I cannot bear to be smothered with unreal kindness and the contrast with you is so very striking indeed. It just all reinforces to me how truly special and magical you are and how much you enrich my life. It is simply torturous to have to spend time apart and I am so very grateful for this next two weeks as they approach.

My heart constantly yearns for you when we are apart – you are the love of my life and I want you with me please – I love you x.